What is my true identity?

Who am I?

Let’s look at some of these statements that we either make or hear from others.

“I am angry”

“I am frustrated”

“I am now 5’3” tall; was only 16” tall when born”

“I am cold/hot”

“I am really happy”

What we notice in all these statements is the common factor “I” which has been identified with various thoughts, feelings, emotions and other aspects of our life.

The statements imply change in the status of “I” over a period of time or in different life situations. For example, when I say, “I am now 5’3” tall; was only 16” tall when born”, it shows that my physical body has undergone a certain change over the years. As we know, change is always with reference to something that doesn’t change. The constant in all these statements is “I”. Think of this “I” as the substratum or the base reference point with respect to which all change is taking place. The change in the state of the mind from “angry” to “frustrated” to “happy” is also happening in relation to the non-changing substratum “I”.

When we recognize the unchanging state of “I”, then we can see that the statement “I am angry” doesn’t make sense. How can something that is unchanging be identified with “anger” or “frustration” which are simply the changing states of the mind? In reality, then, it is the mind that is experiencing “anger” or “frustration” etc., not the substratum “I”. The next question that we need to address is “who does this mind belong to?” If the body is fat or sick, who does this body belong to?

Let us turn our attention to some of the statements below:

“My computer is slow”

“My shoulder is weak”

“My body is fat”

“My mind is dull today”

“I have a sharp intellect”

In the statement, “My computer is slow”, we are talking about two separate entities – a computer and its owner who can say “my computer”. Similarly, when I say, “My shoulder is weak”, we are talking of two entities – the shoulder and the one who is claiming to be its owner. The key fact to note here is that we are talking about two separate entities – the owner and the owned. They cannot be the same! When I say, “my computer”, the computer and I are two separate entities. When I say, “my intellect”, the intellect and the owner “I” are two distinct entities.

Let us try to understand this unchanging substratum “I” which we have identified as the “owner” of the entire mind, body and the material complex. Based on the discussion so far, we can see that this “I” is separate from the body, mind, and any material object out there. You may have often heard statements like, “I am not the body”, “I am not the mind nor my thoughts” etc. These statements are highlighted in the first of the collection of verses called “Nirvana Shatkam” by Shankaracharya:

मनोबुद्ध्यहङ्कार चित्तानि नाहं न च श्रोत्रजिह्वे न च घ्राणनेत्रे ।

न च व्योम भूमिर्न तेजो न वायुः चिदानन्दरूपः शिवोऽहम् शिवोऽहम् ॥१॥

manobuddhyahaṅkāra cittāni nāhaṃ na ca śrotrajihve na ca ghrāṇanetre .

na ca vyoma bhūmirna tejo na vāyuḥ cidānandarūpaḥ śivo’ham śivo’ham ||1||

“I am not the mind, intellect, or the ego; I am not the organs of hearing (ears), tasting (tongue), smelling (nose) or seeing (eyes); I am not the great elements – the sky, the earth, the fire or the air; I am the ever-pure, blissful consciousness; I am Shiva, I am Shiva.”

Yoga and Samkhya system of thought

To understand this concept better, we need to dive a little deeper into the underlying concepts presented in the Yoga and Samkhya systems of thought.

In this system of thought, the underlying principle is given the name Purusha and the complex of mind, body, and all the material objects is given the technical name Prakriti. The term Purusha is usually translated or understood as the Self or the Atma. Prakriti is everything that is not this Self. As per the Samkhya system of thought, the Prakriti has no consciousness of its own. For it to function and do its job, it needs to borrow the consciousness from Purusha. This consciousness is considered as being reflected onto the Prakriti.  it is basically reflected onto the intellect, or the composite function called the internal organ which is a combination of the mind (manas), the intellect (buddhi) and the ego (ahamkara). It is this reflected consciousness that allows the intellect, mind, ego etc. to function and do their job of experiencing the material creation.

Unfortunately, due to ignorance (avidya), we begin to identify this reflected consciousness as being our true identity. That is why we begin to make statements like “I am angry”, “I am suffering” etc.

Self Realization

Patanjali, in chapter 1 of the Yoga Sutras (sutras 1.2 and 1.3), gives us the very definition of yoga, practicing which we can become aware of our true identity.

Sutra 1.2

योगश्चित्तवृत्तिनिरोधः॥२॥ yogaś-citta-vr̥tti-nirodhaḥ ॥2॥

“The restraint of the modifications of the mind-stuff is Yoga.”

Sutra 1.3

तदा द्रष्टुः स्वरूपेऽवस्थानम्॥३॥ tadā draṣṭuḥ svarūpe-‘vasthānam ॥3॥

“Then the Seer [Self] abides in His own nature.”

Sutra 1.2 acknowledges that the mind is constantly churning thoughts etc. Through the practices of yoga, one can learn how to calm the mind and still the chain of thoughts. In sutra 1.3, he gives us the outcome of this practice which is to become aware of our true nature, also called “self-realization”.

Paradigm shift

How do we apply these concepts in our day-to-day life? Try this paradigm shift – instead of saying, “I am angry”, try saying, “my mind is experiencing anger”; Instead of saying, “I have gained weight”, try saying, “my body has gained weight” etc. This might seem a little awkward or unnatural in the beginning, but with practice, you will begin to realize its true importance. This shift will help us stay more peaceful, less stressed and eventually lead us in the direction of realizing our true nature.