Pain is unavoidable, suffering is by choice

Pain/suffering

“Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional” is a popular saying, usually attributed to some Buddhist source. In common usage, the words “pain” and “suffering” are often used interchangeably. Before we understand the true essence of this statement, we need to clearly understand the difference between the two words as used in the quotation referenced.

What is pain?

The widely accepted definition of pain was developed by a taxonomy task force of the International Association for the Study of Pain: “Pain is an unpleasant sensory and emotional experience that is associated with actual or potential tissue damage or described in such terms.”

Pain is mediated by specific nerve fibers that carry the pain impulses to the brain where it gets classified as mild, severe, intense, throbbing, continuous, unbearable etc.

What causes pain?

Pain at the physical level can be caused by an accident, illness, bone fracture, headache, stomachache, pain during childbirth, a physical condition like back ache, neck pain etc. Many of my yoga students mention chronic pain conditions, especially in the shoulders, back and the hips, as the main reason for joining the yoga class.

Pain at the mental or psychological level can be caused by events like a death in the family, a house being burnt down, a car being stolen, sudden financial loss due to a slump in the stock market etc. These are all situations which are unavoidable and will continue to happen during the course of our lives.

What is suffering?

For the purpose of this discussion, we can define suffering as our interpretation and the emotional reaction to the physical or mental pain experienced. Based on our past experiences of pain and pleasure, we start building stories around the current painful experience. This usually results in our projecting the current scenario to a painful, sometimes agonizing future outcome which continues to cause constant mental suffering.

For example, if we get into an accident and break some bones, we are bound to have physical pain. But, should we allow that pain to be felt as suffering in the mind? We definitely need to take care of the injury and the pain by seeking appropriate medical attention. However, if we allow the ego to take over and start feeling helpless and miserable, we can actually delay the process of healing. We might start thinking, “Oh my God! I will have to miss several weeks of my job due to this injury. How am I going to earn money and support my family. I may even lose my job”. etc. etc. This is what we can call imaginary suffering which is caused by negative thinking about a present situation and also negatively projecting imaginary consequences into the future. However, if we can stay focused on taking care of the physical pain and eliminate mental projections, we can quickly regain health and prevent suffering in the future.

Some of the common emotions attached with this type of suffering are: anxiety, anger, fear, depression, guilt, frustration, shame, a feeling of isolation and loneliness, helplessness etc. This constant negative thinking continues to build upon these emotions and can even lead to a mental breakdown. This level of emotional suffering causes further physical pain and ailments of various kinds; and the cycle goes on.

What causes suffering?

As noted above, suffering is the result of our mental and emotional reaction to the physical or mental pain that we have experienced. Another term that is commonly used for suffering these days is stress. To understand the cause of stress or suffering, we need to understand how the mind functions. In a previous article, I had discussed the way the mind functions. A quick review of that article will help you understand the cause of stress presented here better.

As discussed in the article referenced above, the mind can be thought of as being a composite of four functions – cognitive, intellect, ego and memories.

It is the memory where we store all the past impressions, called “samskaras”. All our actions, reactions, thoughts, behavior patterns, emotions etc. get recorded in the memory. As per yoga philosophy, these impressions are not just from this life but also from previous lives. This memory contains what we like, what we dislike, what we fear etc. When we are confronted with a situation, we find a match with what is stored in the samskaras. If the pattern matches with what we like, we become happy; if the pattern matches with what we dislike, we become unhappy, angry, jealous or greedy etc. Again, as I explained in the article referenced earlier, all this pattern matching and the subsequent feelings and emotions that erupt in the mind are controlled by the ego. It is the ego which loves to dwell in the past or in the future which is nothing but an extrapolation of the past.

When we experience physical or mental pain, it is the ego that offers a reaction based on pre-programmed responses that are stored deep in our subconscious mind as samskaras. Based on this reaction, the ego begins to weave all kinds of stories which lead to further suffering and agony.

Can suffering be avoided?

Since the cause of suffering is the ego, it is reasonable to expect that if we can somehow diminish the influence of the ego and sharpen the intellect, we should be able to avoid suffering. Ego gains dominance since we are not aware of our true nature as being pure consciousness. Due to our ignorance, we identify ourselves with the ego and the mind and thus allow the ego to dominate. How do we realize our true nature? Patanjali, in the Yoga Sutras, offers us the eight-fold path of yoga (Ashtanga Yoga) which, when practiced diligently, can help us sharpen the intellect and lead to realization of our true nature. From a practical point of view. the three most important components of the path of yoga are asana (physical postures), pranayama (breathing practices) and meditation. It is through the practice of meditation that we can weaken the hold that the past impressions (samskaras) have on us. When the samskaras are weakened, the ego automatically loses its control on the mind. This will ultimately help us avoid suffering.

There is a very famous couplet in Hindi by the Saint poet Kabir:

“दुःख में सुमिरन सब करे, सुख में करे न कोई ।
जो सुख में सुमिरन करे, तो दुःख काहे को होय ॥”

“dukha men simarana sab kare, sukha men kare na koye,
jo sukha men simarana kare to dukha kahe ko hoye”

Meaning of the couplet: Everyone remembers and prays to God when confronted with hardship or pain. When people have no pain, they do not think of Him. However, if we were to think of Him even while we are happy then there will never be a reason to be unhappy or to suffer.

For example, only when we are diagnosed with high cholesterol levels, we start thinking of changing the diet and doing some exercise. This couplet says that if we were to make the proper choice of the right diet and exercise today, we may actually prevent or delay the onset of high cholesterol and potential heart problems.

In summary, pain, both physical and mental, is unavoidable in life. It is up to us to make sure that we don’t convert this pain into emotional suffering. By the practice of the various limbs of yoga, we can train the mind to not dwell on the pain, and not build stories around the painful situation to cause agony and suffering.